Wednesday, April 16, 2008

The Rainbow's End

Ulong Beach, Ulong Island, Republic of Palau - It's where they filmed Survivor: Palau!
Recipe for the perfect paradise, a.k.a. Palau
  • 1 sun, bright and warm
  • 1 beautiful archipelago, about 70 islands of limestone, mushroom shaped, some tiny, some long and large, covered in lush vegetation, stripped of people
  • A few beaches, white sand, free of garbage
  • 1 enormous seabed, including shallow areas, some underwater caverns, channels and canyons, underwater mountains, and dropoffs whose bottoms vanish from sight


  • A bunch of marine lakes, saltwater, created when the the islands rose above the surface
  • A myriad of corals, tube worms, sponges and anemones to bring color and flavor to the seabed: feathered, fan, bulb, cabbage, etc.


  • Underwater vegetation, a generous amount
  • Thousands of species of fish, colored with all shades and tints of the rainbow, of all shapes and sizes, as many schools as you can possibly find.
  • A bushel of rays, manta, spotted eagle, green. Small, large, you'll want them all.
  • As many sharks as you can find, all kinds. The bigger and more dangerous, the better.
  • A smattering of sea turtles, the gracefully gliding, peaceful kind
  • The purest, clearest oceanwater only found hundreds of miles away from any large civilizaton
  • A clear blue sky and clean air, free from pollutants
  • Pockets of beautiful white clouds and a few large gray ones heavy with rain
  • A few birds
  • Lots and lots of cute golden jellyfish, the harmless kind


Remove as many people from the archipelago as you can. Leave a few of the indigenous Palauans to stay and take care of things. Mix seabed and oceanwater in an area hundreds of miles away from civilization. Add corals to taste, coloring the seabed until satisfied. Throw in underwater vegetation, toss vigorously. Place the set of islands on top of seabed.



Throw some of the marine lakes in the low areas of large islands. Sprinkle the beaches sparsely around some of the islands, maybe less than 5% of island perimeter. Drop some birds around the islands, and a few in the water in between islands.



Throw all jellyfish in marine lakes. The one lake that has the most jellyfish, call that Jellyfish Lake, then take a moment to be proud of the immense bounty that is your unrelenting creativity. Take the copious rainbow colored fishes and spread liberally all around the islands. Some of the small ugly black fish, throw those in Jellyfish Lake for no good reason.



Put a few of the fish with huge eye sockets in cavernous dark areas, like Chandelier Cave and the Blue Holes.



Pick a few choice spots to place the rays, perhaps near the German Channel and New Drop Off, and possibly throw in some turtles for good measure. Looking at the giant mass of sharks left, decide to throw them everywhere, at random, mixing sharks of all kinds. Be liberal with the sharks around Blue Corner.



Bake everything in the heat of the sun for eons. When done, it should smell, feel, look, sound and taste like absolute bliss. Enjoy liberally with friends and diving buddies. Serves all those daring enough to visit it and go below the surface, until it is destroyed by time, Mother Nature or humanity.

The Republic of Palau from above. Paradise found.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

om flippin god, that looks pretty darn nice. what path did you take to reach there?